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White Out & Wide Open—The Blog

Fiction Make The Best Facts
Bad science makes great script

By Steve Janes

            Some of you wonder why I devote so much time to a “non snowmobile” related topic like global warming. And that’s a solid question worthy of a legitimate explanation … to an illegitimate issue.

            I guess my answer is twofold: first, since the environmental movement clearly has its sights set on taking down all forms of motorized recreation, it’s my way of fighting back by basically mocking this movement at the core of its beliefs. And second, it’s so much fun to irritate environmentalists by using their so called “facts” against them.

            Yes, there is a danger of boring readers with too much “non essential” information about things that don’t help your sled to go faster. And many of our readers would just as leave avoid politics and social issues. But the way I look at it, if I do the research and gleam through the reams of articles, I can provide a service to my readers by just offering summaries of what’s being presented as facts.

            For example, did you realize that ants can save the earth from global warming?

            Well, according to a study published by Ronald Dorn, geography professor at Arizona State University, these tiny creatures manufacture limestone which traps carbon dioxide gas from the atmosphere. So basically, if we could just get the ant population to take over the earth, then all would be saved.

            Now I’m not sure how much funding was provided by the state of Arizona or by the federal government, but I feel a lot better knowing that as billions of ants pick through my carcass while I sleep, the earth is becoming a cooler place.

            So over the next several weeks (or until the snow starts to fall in the higher elevations), I’m going to provide some helpful tidbits  on global warming that will allow you to go to sleep at night knowing there’s peace in the universe.

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October 02, 2014

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