Let's try this out-jokes all around post em up.
What's the best part about getting head from an Ethio pian chick?
You know she's gonna swallow!
You know she's gonna swallow!
My girlfriend and I were having sex the other day when she looked at me and said, "Make love to me like in the movies."
So I f ucked her in the azz, pulled out, and came all over her face and hair.
I guess we don't watch the same movies.
So I f ucked her in the azz, pulled out, and came all over her face and hair.
I guess we don't watch the same movies.
A family is driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and to spare her young daughter's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, that was just an insect." To which, her daughter replies, "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a c ock like that."
Two homeless men are standing around bragging about their day. The First hobo says "Today i found $20, and was able to buy a nice hot meal. It was my luckiest day ever!".
to which the second hobo replies: "oh yeah, my day was way better! I was at the train yard, and found a woman tied to the train tracks. After I untied her, we f ucked all day"
"Did you get a blow job?"
"Naw, I couldnt find her head"
to which the second hobo replies: "oh yeah, my day was way better! I was at the train yard, and found a woman tied to the train tracks. After I untied her, we f ucked all day"
"Did you get a blow job?"
"Naw, I couldnt find her head"
An elementary school teacher, a lawyer, a Catholic priest and three young boys are on a plane with only three parachutes. Engines explode, plane starts going down.
The teacher says, 'Save the children!'
The lawyer yells, 'F UCK THE CHILDREN!'
The Catholic priest looks around and whispers, 'Is there time?'
The teacher says, 'Save the children!'
The lawyer yells, 'F UCK THE CHILDREN!'
The Catholic priest looks around and whispers, 'Is there time?'
A woman successfully gives birth after several hours of labor. The doctor takes the baby and leaves the room to perform some tests. Several minutes later, the doctor returns with the baby in his arms and then suddenly begins to punch it, kick it, throw it about the room and slam it against an adjacent wall. The woman screams, "OH MY GOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY BABY?!" To which the doctor replies, "April Fool's! It was already dead!"
A guy goes to a whorehouse and tells the madam he only wants to spend 5 bucks. The madam thinks for a bit, then says, "Betsy. She's down the hall, last door on the left."
The guy walks down, sees Betsy -- she's not the best looking, but she would do. He puts it in and it's the worst feeling he's ever had on his d ick -- like sandpaper and teeth. He pulls out and tells her. "Um. something's wrong, can you do something about that?" Betsy crinkles her face, then says, "Why of course! But it will run you another five bucks." She pockets the fiver and goes to the bathroom and is back in no time.
The guy puts it back in and now, it's the complete opposite: it's the best feeling he's ever had, and finishes in a flash. Panting, he asks her, "oh my god... that felt amazing... what did you do??" Betsy smiles, and says, "for the extra five bucks, I pick the scabs."
The guy walks down, sees Betsy -- she's not the best looking, but she would do. He puts it in and it's the worst feeling he's ever had on his d ick -- like sandpaper and teeth. He pulls out and tells her. "Um. something's wrong, can you do something about that?" Betsy crinkles her face, then says, "Why of course! But it will run you another five bucks." She pockets the fiver and goes to the bathroom and is back in no time.
The guy puts it back in and now, it's the complete opposite: it's the best feeling he's ever had, and finishes in a flash. Panting, he asks her, "oh my god... that felt amazing... what did you do??" Betsy smiles, and says, "for the extra five bucks, I pick the scabs."
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes...
Nothin she ain't listening and you already told her twice..
Nothin she ain't listening and you already told her twice..
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