Frozen moto- does she have protective gear? If she was wearing a vest, knee pads, etc maybe she would feel more confident? But it also takes time. The more time I spend on a sled the faster my responses are, and the more confident I am. I grew up training colts and if she rides she knows how much time that takes. Experience and time mean a lot. My husband is a better sledder and snowboarder than I am, but on horses I'm the one that is really experienced. When you start to take her sledding, I think one of the best things is to go somewhere easier, and not push too hard. Don't go where there's really technical areas, or areas that are do or die. She needs to get comfortable handling the sled and learning techniques in safe terrain first.
And when she's learning, take those days as just learning/ fun days. Don't expect it to be a challenging ride for you, keep it fun and light and help her learn the basics and important techniques. If she has to keep up with all the guys when she doesn't even know how to ride, it's going to sour the experience and make it more stressful than fun. My husband and friends took a lot of time helping me learn and being patient, and it has paid off.
Kristy- I don't have any women here to ride with, but I would go without my husband if there were. I care more about riders attitudes and how reliable they are than anything. The people I ride with are people I'd be comfortable riding with whether my husband is there or not. And if it's someone I wouldn't want to ride with alone, we probably wouldn't go with them anyway. 90% of the time I can get my sled unstuck or out of a tree myself. It might take more time, but unless it really just involves brute strength I'm confident I can eventually get out. I also try to know my sled mechanically as well as I can. I carry tools, and lots of other things that I've ended up needing. Adds a few pounds, but I can fix my sled on the mountain for the most part. Most of the guys we ride with are better mechanics than I am, but I'm pretty comfortable with my mechanical abilities without them also.
(I will admit I have read my shop manual several times). I think learning your sleds mechanics and carrying your own tools, as well as learning to get your sled out of bad situations, can go a long ways towards your confidence. Knowing I can handle most difficult situations without a guy around makes a difference in my riding. But when I'm riding with guys (brute strength available!) that I can trust and depend on, I feel I can take more risks. If I was riding with one other girl, I wouldn't get myself into some of the situations I do. But with several women together, well I've seen how effective that can be with sticks and trees. Don't underestimate the creativeness and strength of a bunch of experienced women riders!